My Retro Gaming Livestream!

Watch live streaming video from teknosynth at livestream.com

Monday, February 22, 2010

"What is with this guy and cranks?"


A few days ago Capcom so awesomely released Lost In Nightmares, an expanded chapter and the latest in the line of DLC for Resident Evil 5 across both Playstation 3 and Xbox 360 consoles simultaneously.

Lost In Nightmares takes you back through the past of Chris Redfield and Jill Valentine, when they were on assignment with the BSAA to track down Albert Wesker who had previously defected from S.T.A.R.S, and contrived a plan of his own to manipulate the Umbrella Corporation.



Set in an eerily nostalgic Spencer Mansion(just another one, not the original), you are tasked with...well nostalgia.
If It's one thing that I'll credit Capcom for, It's that they really know how to take you back to the past. Lost In Nightmares is definitely a treat for anyone who stepped into the shoes of our two protagonists in the first Resident Evil title. The whole layout and placement of objects is quite uncanny(creepy), and allows to to relive those feelings of anxiety and claustrophobia. Even the characters themselves are thrown back to the events of the first mansion, and are saying pretty much everything you're thinking. The Spencer "Estate" contains a fair amount of classic RE puzzle solving(cranks and levers ^_^), as well as some minor back-tracking, and a new play-mate(abomination)for you to contend with(and it is SUCH a joy the first time you meet)as well. Capcom has also graciously put in a nice little easter egg for all It's fans(nostalgic and newcomers alike)by enabling the classic "fixed camera mode," a matter which is achieved by participating in a certain "door checking event(giant happy grin)."

So how does this expanded chapter add up? Is it worth 400 microsoft points(roughy $5 USD), I'd say yes on the grounds that it delivers much in such a short amount of time(very short). During your first run of the game it should take about 1-2 hours at maximum to complete, given that you're trying to get a feel for your surroundings. Once you've gotten yourself acquainted, subsequent/follow-up play-throughs should clock in at just about 30-40 minutes tops. Granted that this is all from the perspective of a solo game(with the A.I. controlled 2nd player being a bit less stupid than before...thank goodness), in co-op(local/xbox live)you should be able to accomplish everything much quicker and more efficiently. In fact I believe that Capcom's intention was for two human analogs to run the gauntlet together as "partners."

Lost In Nightmares is a short, but oh so sweet flash-back expansion. It bolsters some nice fluff to the already complex story-line of the entire franchise, and surprisingly has much replay value. Because of how long the chapter isn't and that It's just so damn fun, you can pick up a controller and pop this right onto the TV like it were any classic NES title(although oddly enough, Nintendo being the only system this particular game isn't on...burn!), a feat that is rarely seen these days in the realm of video games...damn you Capcom, for being so brilliantly nostalgic!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

May your sins be absolved, or be forever damned!


Dante's Inferno is the latest project by none other than Visceral Games, a subsidiary of Electronic Arts who brought us the Dead Space franchise in October of 2008. Dante's Inferno is part of the Divine Comedy, an epic poem written by Dante Alighieri between the period of 1308-1321, and is based on his visual/graphic representation of a "Christian" hell.


As the main protagonist of the same name, your mission in the opening act and/or tutorial level is loosely based in history, as is has you participating in the 3rd Crusade. A particular event in which the European leaders have you forcefully reclaiming the Holy Land from Saladin under orders of the Pope. It's here that you come face-to-face with your own mortality and battle for redemption from eternal damnation against Death.


Before mentioning anything more about the plot and what-not since this is kind of a tie in of sorts. Dante's Inferno is steeped in controversy, and if there's one thing that there's a copious abundance of in this game is simply...boobs, tits, breasts(insert name for the aforementioned subject). But they aren't just there to be a distraction, which in most cases you don't really have time to be glazed over by such wonders since you'll more than likely be fighting or dying...probably both. The representation of sexuality in this game isn't so much pleasurable as it is corrupt and disgusting, but also somewhat comical because of how over-the-top some of it is(every naughty bit of the Lust Level, I'll leave it at that). However, being that it is Hell it would seem fitting for it to be so, It's all about sin and not in a good way(is there a good way?).

That beauty pictured above is Beatrice Portinari(I wish I could find a better picture of her, at least pre-inferno because she is quite beautiful. However google images sucks, and google sucks because people like to fill it with ridiculous amounts of crap that's completely unrelated to the subject matter...oh well, moving on), Dante's wife/love interest who's soul was stolen away from him after making and losing a deal to Lucifer, during his return to Italy from the Crusades. Unwilling to damn an innocent soul(and his wife for that matter)Dante gives chase and fights through the Nine Circles of Hell to free her.

Your epic journey takes you through: Limbo, Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Anger, Heresy, Violence, Fraud, and Treachery under the guidance of another poet Virgil, who also acted as the guide for the poet Dante Alighieri on his epic journey. Although I'd like to go through great detail about each of these, It's more of a sight to immerse in yourself. Based on the descriptive imaginings from the poem itself(which actually sticks pretty close to the source material for the most part)while having It's own spin from the developers, the Nine Circles of Hell are filled with pretty much everything/anything you can imagine while provoking thought to the very basis(in this case the word of representation. or title)of the Circles themselves.

Being a game of the action genre, Dante's Inferno has your furiously fighting through the hordes of the underworld, every manner of demon and beast is sent after you, attempting to thwart your quest. However, Dante isn't without his resources. Brandishing Death's scythe and Beatrice's Cross which is imbued with the Holy Spirit, Dante is given many options in which he is to deal with his enemies. Like most action oriented titles, you mash buttons in combination with one another to engage the enemy in a stylish, yet effective fashion. Using the scythe for more up-close encounters, and the cross for ranged battles since It's main function is to fire out volleys of cross-shaped energy.



One of the more central themes in this game is the soul, and which path It's allowed to take, combat is no exception to this rule. And although you can't do this to everyone, for most of the enemies you're given the choice either: damn, where your obliterate them with your scythe, or absolve them by striking them with your cross. During your travels, you may also happen upon some historically note-worthy denizens of the Inferno which you may also choose to damn or absolve(restricted to the denizens themselves, absolving takes you through a Dance Dance Revolution type of mini-game which allows you to play for bonus basic soul experience). Following through with one of these actions allows you to obtain: holy, or unholy experience which can be used to level up those respected skill trees, allowing you to unlock further additions to combos, access to magic, and upgrades to health and mana reserves. Remember how I mentioned choice earlier? Well, you can just defeat your enemies without regard of neither damn nor absolve, and just obtain basic soul experience which is used to buy all that you've unlocked on the trees.



Another added element to this title is the addition of relics, which are scattered throughout the Nine Circles. Relics, are accessories that enhance Dante's abilities and unlock special little tweaks to further assist you in battle. Ranging from more experience gain, to auto-countering upon a successful block, they're there to make life in Hell a little easier for you(^_^).

While Dante's Inferno borrows mechanics from titles like God of War, namely flow of combat and quick-time events, I believe that It's a game all on It's own and should be allowed to stand as such. It deserves merit and justification for taking the concept of an epic poem, and translates quite well in my opinion into the medium of video games. Telling the story in as little as a few hours(about 8-10 with the first play-through...because It's impossible to get everything in one go), it does a fairly good job of keeping with the themes/elements of the original medium, which leaves you to beg the question: what won't I get sent to hell for?

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Gamers can't seem to realize that Dante's Inferno isn't God of War apparently...

Before we start this fiasco, let me state that I originally wanted to just make a simple review about this game. However after reading through numerous reviews about this game, and my own experiences/conclusions thrown into the mix. I feel as though I have to address this growing epidemic of bull-shit, centered around this title.

This is really just a long rant, but in light of that I'd like to consider this part one of the now, two-part Dante's Inferno review. So why so much trouble/controversy over a title such as this? Let's find out!


Dante's Inferno, a game that only I seemed I care about, much like Tatsunoko vs. Capcom. Did you know that on the release date of the latter aforementioned game, that I was one of two people to actually pre-order the title? Much of that scenario was replayed when I strolled into GameStop on Tuesday morning. Needless to say I felt like something was wrong, but I guess that's what happens when the sequel to BioShock is released on the same day. -_-

Getting into the thick of it, let's take a gander at one of the major factors surrounding/asphyxiating Dante's Inferno which doesn't give this game It's fair dues. If you haven't figured it out from oh...nearly(there's probably only one that seems fair)all of the reviews out there since I last checked, all anyone seems to do is compare it to God of War. Now I know similar play styles, and certain game mechanics will garner comparison to something that did it before and what not, but in light of a fair critical analysis, most reviewers and reviewies tend to stick with(and I paraphrase): "_______________________________________________________________________________"(insert any and or random comment/comparison about God of War because that's what this game was apparently suppose to have been, but because this wasn't God of War it was terrible.)You know, that's so funny because last time I checked, this game was titled: "Dante's Inferno" and not God of War right? I mean when I pre-ordered/bought the "title" it was under the name, Dante's Inferno right? Hmm...



...well according to the box cover, I have indeed purchased Dante's Inferno and not God of War, I guess the majority of people on the web with an apparent lack of any sort of free will(you know, that thing that lets you decide for yourself about something)at all can't be right all the time huh?

Adding more insult to injury is the overly restated fact that it "emulates the style of God of War poorly." Alright, what game in the action genre doesn't have some form of quick-time events? For that matter, what action game whose main focus on close-quarters combat doesn't have a "button-mashing-combo" system? Do I need to go on? Seriously, do I?

I suppose the point of all this if you haven't been able to put the picture together yet, is that in every single pro/con about Dante's Inferno whether It's mentioned or not is in some way/shape/form the bastard child of It's "parent," God of War. Having little to no mention about the actual game and story that It's based around(pretty much because It's weighed down by a ton of bull-shit), Dante's Inferno quite literally lives in the shadow of the parent it never had, and until people get over it, it will never truly shine and once and for all be recognized as a title all on It's own.

Stick around for part two, which will be posted later in the day. Or when I get around to it...

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Nintendo Wii and Wi-Fi...

Dear Nintendo,

If you're going to enable wi-fi play in your games, namely the fighting genre. Perhaps it would do you some good to have more of, and better optimized dedicated servers. Mostly so that the many players around the world who choose to play in a competitive fashion, can do so in a manner which involves little to no lag(enabling the m
ost competitive, streamlined, and fun style of play...you know, the way that it was meant to be played). Also it would be nice to not have to sit in front of my television for 15 minutes trying to connect to someone on a worldwide scale, only to not find anyone yet for some reason there are leader-boards with data on them...meaning that someone probably left their system on for god knows how long.

Thanks...oh wait, not really Douche-Bags!

P.S. Since the Wi-Fi option is a giant joke, you might as well rename it to "Well, we needed to fill space on this Game, so we just threw some shit together and called it Wi-Fi...but It's actually just shit." And you could actually make it It's own interactive gallery having nothing to do with the game, at least then you're being honest and sincere with your customers.




So how many of you own a Nintendo Wii? *Cr
icket chirp* Alright...I only needed one hand to count that, j/k I was talking to an empty room! Moving on.

Why is it that Nintendo just doesn't give two shits about the community that backs them? They say that they're not competing with Sony or Microsoft, yet there are basic and yet simple things that a console made in this generation should have but seems to be not much of an issue to the company.

The main problem I and I'm sure many others have seen is the lack of good Wi-Fi capability. Naturally this should be something that is quite the standard in the current state of technology, and the Wii does in fact have Wi-Fi, but let's be honest, out of all the current generation of consoles It's sadly the worst. Hell It's worse than the PSP, a hand-held at that! At least on the PSP I can find people and have a competitive, and also a relatively stream-lined experience which usually amounts to fun because it just is.

So why even enable the players to have this Wi-Fi option? It doesn't do anything but add to the frustration of the day. You're lucky enough to get a connection to someone within 10-15 minutes, which is pretty absurd. Having established a connection luckily, and more often than not an extremely poor one. I remember playing Smash Brothers Brawl over Wi-Fi in my house, trying to have a game with my room-mate in the room next to me and it was god awful...we're talking ridiculous frame rate drops, hell any input on screen was delayed by at least 5-10 seconds. It's this bad trying to connect to someone 10 feet to the right of me, how is it going to get any better when trying to connect with someone miles away from me? Well it just doesn't, plain and simple.

Bottom line being that I care less and less about Nintendo every waking moment of my life. First they alienate the community by focusing solely on the "casual" market. Then try to make up for it by releasing games under their flag-ship titles which more often than not just aren't that good. Finally they try to appeal to the "hard-coresque" competitive audience(which if by competitive you mean Mario Party or Wii Sports just shut the hell up right now...went off on a tangent there, sorry)by stepping up and trying to release games with "Wi-Fi" capability, "play against your friends or challenge anyone in the world in competitive tournament style play...about 5 years from now when we finally connect to that guy in the house next door, with connectivity so slow that in between button inputs you could do things like: the laundry, walk your dog, or take the kids to school. Maybe when you get back, you'll be able to queue up more moves, man this 90 second battle has been going on for 5 hours already and I can't even manipulate time, amazing!" Really Nintendo? REALLY?!?!

At this point there are no excuses. But it's Nintendo, they don't care so why should I or anyone? The fact of the matter is that they should care, they have the resources for such an effort and I don't think we're asking for much.
It's not expected that you get it right the first time but it's been what, 3-4 years since the release of the Wii, and still nothing? If you're going to offer something, don't give us some half-assed attempt to poorly emulate your competition, if you aren't going to be serious about it then don't even offer it up as a viable option, stop wasting our time with unnecessary bull-shit!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Update! Resident Evil 5: Gold Edition!


In accordance with the latest over on Joystiq, the US branch of Capcom will also be releasing RE:5 Alternative Edition as Gold Edition on the 9th of March in the states for both PS3 and 360!

This particular release will be in the physical medium which includes add-on content for PS3 and a download voucher for 360. However if you already own the first incarnation of the game(and I so do!)Capcom is giving you access to the DLC content earlier, practically a whole month earlier! The first of 4 confirmed DLC chapters will be released on the 17th of February for 360, and the 18th for PS3. There isn't very much information about the first chapter aside from It's name: "Lost in Nightmares," and that it will come a custom pack(perhaps more costumes/weapons/or maybe some new multiplayer levels?) The second chapter is set to debut on 3rd(360) and 4th(PS3) of March for each console respectively with a confirmed costume pack along with it!

Exciting times are ahead, soon I'll have to dust off RE:5 and prepare for the battle ahead,
I honestly can't wait to helm the control of Jill Valentine once more and kick some Umbrella ass!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Rant: The "Shallow" end of the pool

Earlier today I went through my normal routine of cruising Joystiq, Kotaku and a myriad of other gaming sites for my daily fix on the up-and-coming for video games. Another place that I frequent Gametrailers for their videos, more notably their trailers(hence the name).

Just another day browsing through when I saw something familiar, the latest installment into the Naruto: Clash of Ninja Revolution Series, the 3rd entry to be exact. They featured demoed gameplay by none other than the folks over at
Willvolution, which by the way are a very talented and just overall awesome group of gamers that I've had the privilage to compete against.

So I was just minding my own business while watching an exhibition match between Sakura/Kabuto and decided to read some of the initial comments. This was the first mis-taken step into a battle that I had no idea was upon me. Now, before I start getting into this I'd like to say that I try to respect everyone's opinions and give people the benefit of the doubt when I hear them speak out on a topic, even more so on topics/things that I personally enjoy...

Also here is the particular video that all of this occured about, and I will admit that if you're not into this particular kind of game that it probably would seem uninteresting, but hear me out on this one:



...I was skimming through the most recent comments
and ran into some interesting(or not so interesting, nor critical feedback about it)things:

-Yanahana: "
god that was sooooo boring"
-DotZero1: "That fight made this game look boring as hell."

-Raidel007: "well the fight kind of sucked...... "



But that still begs the question, why is it boring? I really don't like it when people have a really "boring" opinion about a particular thing/subject. It doesn't offer anything relative to shift the argument to either side, nor does it keep the argument neutral. All it does is waste space, and time(more so the latter), if there's nothing constructive to say/add then please, just shut the fuck up! There are better things to do than to waste my time, let alone everyone else who stopped to read your comment.


The next comment that I took notice of was a step up from the previous two(not a very large step, but one none the less):


-Soladrin: "wow so boring, all the standard attacks are the same."

Alright, that's fair in the sense that It's kind of constructive, but lets look at this for a second:

1) This is a game of the Fighting genre, so immediately we should at the very least expect things to get repetitive.

2) You can believe all you want that "all" video games need to be unique in every single aspect of game-play and control. But come on now, who are you even beginning to kid around with that kind of statement. While the games of today continue to evolve and offer many new innovations, there's isn't a single game out there where the player doesn't have to repeat something over and over again.
Sure, maybe they can mask it, or do something to make it so that you don't take notice to doing something repetitively which is great, but take that at face value. It's just a mask, and if you can accept that then you shouldn't have any problems with "things being the same."

3) With fighting games every fighter has a set standard of basic moves: punches, kicks, throws, blocks, movements, specials, etc. The point of this being, that this is a standard, you know that thing that you need to unify a specific aspect of a game, in this case your moves/commands. However each character has their own unique style to fit their different personalities, so while they all function the same internally, what makes it different is how each one reacts to the inputs. It's about all the unique little tweaks/quirks that each one possess that sets them apart despite being of a simplistic style.


Then all hell broke loose when I saw these next ones in particular:

-DenHond: "shit players or shit game? Only time will tell...?"
-ThatGuy: "
these players suck...oh i get it they are american players arnt they."

And the gauntlet comes down...correct me if I'm wrong but you(DenHond)are under the current assumption that these two particular individuals are of the coveted(sarcasm folks, if you aren't use to it by now, then step it up) "shit" caliber of gamers. First off, back the fuck down right now, having an opinion is all good, but never under any pretense just out right shoot down a particular person's style of play, we're all different and use different means to reach the same goal...in short don't be a fucking asshole. Second, what exactly makes this a "shit" kind of game? Going back to an earlier argument, why is this particular game a "shit" game? You've once again managed to not offer anything constructive to the mix, and wasted more of my time, next!

If there was anyone in there that I would not want to ever meet outside of video games, ThatGuy *sigh* you take the cake. Why would you, let alone anyone ever have such a damned shallow opinion about a specified affiliation of gamers with such a stupid blanket statement? You've put it out in the open now that YOU have this belief that not specific american gamers suck, but that all american gamers suck. Who the fuck do you think you are? It's probably safe to argue that YOU may have had experiences where certain individuals may have been of a lesser skill level than yourself that happened to be american, or maybe had someone behave in a very unsportsman-like conduct to you that also happened to be american, however that does not garner you absolution to verbally decimate anyone under the title of "american." You have not, and probably will not ever compete with every single one of us, even under the pretense of just fun. So shut the fuck up or get the fuck out! Either way you need a serious shift in perspective, no one should have to tolerate the shit that just dribbled out of your mouth ever.

We(the gaming community)have individuals like ThatGuy, and many other useless contributers to the trolling movement to thank, for continuing to make a conscious effort in lowering the bar for us. Most gamers, especially the really competitive bunch seem like a group of assholes, and to other gamers no less(shocking isn't it?). What happened to being friendly in the face of competition, or just being friendly? Is it really alright to let this grow and continue? I personally don't think so. Also, if I happen to meet any of you(individuals much like the above descripted)and you wonder maybe why we aren't getting along so well...take a look in the mirror and if you have enough insight, then maybe you'll realize that you're just going about it all wrong.

Monday, November 16, 2009

New Super Mario Bros Wii ---> First Impressions


Alright Nintendo, you got me and I'll admit to it. As some of you may know, the latest in the Mario franchise: New Super Mario Bros Wii debuted on Sunday(which is a really strange day for a game release in my opinion, but we're not here to talk about that).

New Super Mario Bros for the Nintendo Wii is an extremely fun game, and a worthy addition to the somewhat recently diluted Mario franchise(this is
looking at you Super Mario Galaxy). Originally thought of as a port of the DS game, many fans didn't seem too excited to see this at E3 '09. I also had my doubts because of the heavy focus on multiplayer, which in most Mario titles are but this game specifically has 4 players(Mario, Luigi, and two Toad characters) simultaneously playing at the same time. I believed that at the time I dubbed it Mario: Four Swords(parodying the Zelda: Four Swords Adventure title), which to me didn't seem like it was in the wrong at all, I mean when you give 4 people(friends hopefully)the opportunity to work together one of two things inevitably happen: 1)everyone starts the game all happy and nice, but then it eventually degenrates into fighting amongst yourselves for the coins(any type of currency), or power-ups, and no one want to cooperate because not everyone is of the same skill level. 2)Everyone ends up having a good time regardless of what happens. In most cases the former happens more often than the latter, usually ending friendships too.

In this particular case however I was wrong, after having obtained a copy of it for myself I must say that NSMBW(New Super Mario Bros Wii)is probably the most fun/entertaining gaming experience I've had in a while! I would go so far as to say that It's encouraged that everyone plays this one with friends because it would be too boring
alone. My roommates and I took it for a test run and we've just reached the start of the 4th world(after many ridiculous deaths and much laughter at one another).

NSMBW is very heavily influenced by Super Mario Bros 3(probably the best and most awesome Mario entry for the NES)with It's world structure which if you remember is much like a game board. A few things that return are the mushroom houses, and simple control scheme which involves using the Wiimote horizontally like a classic NES
controller(D-Pad and two button interface). Yoshi, makes a return and is treated much like It's Super Mario World counter-part. Your main antagonists in NSMBW are none other than the Koopa Kids whom haven't been seen(at least by me)since SMB3, and Baby Bowser.

Level structure also brings back a feeling of nostalgia by recreating specific themes and types of gameplay from many of the classic Mario titles. Some new things added into the mix are a bunch of new power-ups(which I don't know the official name of so we just made some names up off the top of our heads): Freezie Flower, Propeller Suit, and Penguin Suit! Music which is usually a driving force behind the Mario games seems somewhat bland this time around(I've only heard about 4 songs so far), It appears to just be there for background since you won't be paying much attention to it anyway.

If I'd have to make an estimate, NSMBW would be around 7-10 hours of gameplay with a ridiculous amount of replay value. With 8 worlds to explore, each carrying their own little secrets you'll be playing this one for a very long time. It caters to the gamers who crave the feeling of nostalgia, and for newcomers who just want to dive into the fun of a classic Mario game with a fresh spin on it!